Well here we are folks. The moment has finally arrived. Our son, the most beautiful, adorable, cutest kid anywhere on the planet has finally hit the terrible two's. We've been fostering this babe since he was 14 months old and are finally on the adoption track. But lately, I've been having my doubts (not seriously). J. was diagnosed with mid-range ASD last year and on some levels he's in the early toddler/older baby stage. We only needed to close a door to any room and he would not enter where he shouldn't be. In the last week or so, that rule no longer applies. Twice last week he opened the door to the main bathroom and twice I had to replace the brand new rolls of toilet paper. I finally gave up the tp stand and put the roll on an upper shelf of the etagere' above the toilet. We also kept a few things on the window sill that has his dresser in front of it with the boom box on top. Not anymore. His kid size table makes a great "stand" upon which he climbs to get any of the fascinating items once kept on the sill. These little gems now reside on a much higher shelf in his closet. We also kept a small collection of his favorite books on the entertainment center, supposedly out of his reach. Innovative little J. stands on a rocking chair next to the entertainment center and pulls all the books down at once and remains standing while he picks his current favorite read and then climbs down to read it.
The privy in our bedroom conceals his favorite toy of all: The toilet scrub brush! Generally, he keeps it out of his mouth. Yummy treats to eat he saves for the toilet paper he just unravelled from the roll. I don't bother re-rolling the paper. It's too time consuming and it just pisses me off. Sometimes I just want to give him back or maybe just keep him until somebody else adopts him. But of course we love the little tyke and we've all formed a very strong bond, regardless of the hard work involved in raising a child with Autism. So I think I'll welcome nap time this afternoon and have a good stiff drink, which if it weren't damaging to him, I'd let him have one, too.nd a good stiff drink which would be even better if I could share it with him!
We had called him "Poop Master J." for obvious reasons but for now he has been renamed to "Imp Master J." Does this ever end??????????
So says Amma today.
Wednesday, January 23, 2008
Monday, January 14, 2008
Addendum to today's blog
I almost forgot! Hubby made a lateral move with his company and will be covering the northeast which includes part of NY, CT, RI, LI, and my beloved NJ!! He commented that maybe I could be on vacation in south Jersey when he has to be there for business and so might vaca together. I said that maybe there's hope yet for a move back "home". We'll just have to wait and see, especially since it's way more expensive to live there than here. But I think we could manage. For now, I call it the 5 year plan so we'll just have to wait and see. Last summer was more of a working vacation since we stayed at my neice's house while they went to Wildwood for the week. I think it was a little too much for me and the grandkids so hopefully we can rent something this year.
Keeping my fingers crossed and praying daily!!!
So says amma (again).
Keeping my fingers crossed and praying daily!!!
So says amma (again).
Zoom!
I've been wondering if a new computer would be in my future. But, thanks to husband's twin (he and his family were here for Turkey Day), I learned that I needed (1) a new mouse and (2) more memory. So after Christmas, as I set about helping my grandson cash in some of his gift cards at Best Buy, all by myself I picked out a new mouse and hubby actually installed it. Not that I couldn't but I wasn't home and I showed him and he did it. The old one I assumed was a male with only one ball and it appeared as tho that one had been badly castrated. I could barely click and drag just playing solitaire. Even tho the old one was a "Dell", flipping it over it said Logitech and so I replaced it's tired old ball with a Logitech 3x optical. What a huge difference!
Also, as a Christmas gift, hubby got me an e-gift cert from Dell and after searching, bought a 1G memory card. I'm not computer savvy by any means but when it finally arrived, I had to call kid to ask how the heck to open the "tower" so I could put the thing in. I finally figured it out on my own and following most of the directions, got that bad boy installed and it's awesome!!
Even hubby was impressed, mostly because a site he needed to check some of our accounts on he could never get into before just because the 'puter was sooooo slooooooow. Now he was done in mere minutes. I'm impressed myself so now I'll be blogging more often just because I don't have to wait forever to get to where I want to go. So thanks to kid and bubby for they're help and input. And today is a good day to play on the computer thanks to mother nature and her dumping more snow on the entire northeast. It started about 3:30 this morning and we have predictions of up to an inch an hour. No one has school today and we already have a few inches out there. It's not supposed to stop till later today. Thank goodness we hired someone to plow our driveway so poor hubby can get in when he returns from work. At least today he had the 4WD vehicle.
On a lighter than snow note......JMS went to pre-school last Thursday and didn't cry the whole day! The only crying was when they assemble the tykes to go outside for a walk and he thought he was going home. At least we made it through without throwing up and crying all morning. He's still happy to see me and glad to get home.
Next on the agenda, kid needs to call me if she hasn't spoken to her sister in the past couple of days. I've got some dirt to dish that she'll love but we'll see how long this good news will last.
Also, thanks to Courtney for your kind words. We'll have to get together one of these days and show off our beautiful boys!
So says Amma.
Also, as a Christmas gift, hubby got me an e-gift cert from Dell and after searching, bought a 1G memory card. I'm not computer savvy by any means but when it finally arrived, I had to call kid to ask how the heck to open the "tower" so I could put the thing in. I finally figured it out on my own and following most of the directions, got that bad boy installed and it's awesome!!
Even hubby was impressed, mostly because a site he needed to check some of our accounts on he could never get into before just because the 'puter was sooooo slooooooow. Now he was done in mere minutes. I'm impressed myself so now I'll be blogging more often just because I don't have to wait forever to get to where I want to go. So thanks to kid and bubby for they're help and input. And today is a good day to play on the computer thanks to mother nature and her dumping more snow on the entire northeast. It started about 3:30 this morning and we have predictions of up to an inch an hour. No one has school today and we already have a few inches out there. It's not supposed to stop till later today. Thank goodness we hired someone to plow our driveway so poor hubby can get in when he returns from work. At least today he had the 4WD vehicle.
On a lighter than snow note......JMS went to pre-school last Thursday and didn't cry the whole day! The only crying was when they assemble the tykes to go outside for a walk and he thought he was going home. At least we made it through without throwing up and crying all morning. He's still happy to see me and glad to get home.
Next on the agenda, kid needs to call me if she hasn't spoken to her sister in the past couple of days. I've got some dirt to dish that she'll love but we'll see how long this good news will last.
Also, thanks to Courtney for your kind words. We'll have to get together one of these days and show off our beautiful boys!
So says Amma.
Wednesday, January 9, 2008
Recap 2007
2007 was a whirlwind with lots of goings on. We barely settled into our new home and things started happening. We got a "new " car late in '06 and it's been totally awesome. It's an '05 Saturn Relay with automatic sliding doors and most important, a flip down DVD screen. This keeps our soon to be adopted son occupied with now unlimited "Thomas the Tank Engine" movies. As we moved into 2007, we finally started getting the speech therapy needed for our little guy and the therapist (an awesome girl!) gently suggested we think about getting into behavorial testing for autism. All I remember her saying was that Autism is on a huge spectrum. I continued to be in denial but in the back of my mind I knew something wasn't right.
So she got us the referral and we finally got the birthmom to sign all the needed paperwork.
In late April, I lost my beloved Aunt Helen. She's my mom's younger sister and they shared the same birthday. Mom is 5 years older. I really enjoyed e-mailing with her as she was a rather avid computer user. Some years ago she managed to put together quite a family history using the net and it was pretty interesting. Needless to say, it was a sad day for all of us who travelled from as far as the northwest to attend services. It was also great to see all my cousins that I haven't seen (some) in years. Most of us got together for lunch before some of us had to dash off to the airport. I also had the good fortune to visit with an old friend of my aunt's that I hadn't seen since the last of the big weddings of one of Auntie's girls. My aunt and her friend were born a day apart and met in high school and became lifelong chums. When this lady told her mother my aunt's last name, her mom recalled being in the hospital with my grandmother. They didn't know it till high school that they'd actually met at birth! I try to send this lovely lady a note now and then but haven't heard anything back. I'm thinking of calling her to see how she is. I know she never married or had kids and she seemed like she might have a little dementia. She lives in an assisted living apartment. She was still working, part time, taking the train into New York. Her last day of work, she never did get to the office, only as far as Newark and after some couple of hours of delay, went home. That was on 9/11.
In May, I felt a little pain and ignored it. A week or so later, it came back and I got in to see the doctor right away. I scheduled a mammogram and bone density scan since it had been a couple years since the last ones and on June 6 got those done. I flunked both. I have osteoporosis and now take Boniva and try to watch the salt and caffeine. The left breast showed a couple areas of calcifications and I was soon referred to a surgeon. I had a stereo tactic biopsy done (by a doctor who was born at the same hospital I was and also grew up in NJ so that was cool because we talked a lot about "home"). That was June 18 and the results showed I had cancer but it was non-invasive. After discussing the results with the surgeon, I said I'd rather have the whole thing removed because as he described, he might not be able to get it all with lumpectomies of 2 areas and I can get immediate reconstruction. So off to the plastic surgeon to discuss all that and get triple checked before the "Big Day". I also had to quit the butts.
Next up on the menu was our son's testing at Dartmouth Hitchcock in Lebanon, NH. This was supposed to take place Sept. 5 but they had a cancellation so we could look forward to Aug. 16 instead.
In between all this brou ha ha, the state took J.'s birthmom to court in June to terminate the parental rights or do a mediated adoption. The alleged father couldn't be found so his rights to J. were terminated that day. Birthmom wanted the mediated adoption. We got all our meeting and court dates together and she never showed. She also has another child she was going to do the same thing and never showed for that meeting. Seems birthmom broke up with her boyfriend in RI and moved back to NH. And has a miscarriage. She requested to see J. on Aug. 17 and so we went. She still wanted to mediate and was going to call her lawyer. She also got the test results from Dartmouth. Yes, J. was indeed diagnosed with Austism Spectrum Disorder (mid-range) and she said she wanted to go to all his doctor appointments. I had to explain that he'd be getting therapy at home (mine) and that this is not a disease but a neurological disorder. He cried when he saw her and I decided that this was the last time I would subject him to this trauma. But we needed more paperwork signed so we had to put up with it.
On Aug.21 I had my surgery. All went well and from the pathology report, the surgeon got it all. Good news was no chemo or radiation. Now I pretty much belong to the plastic surgeon or "boob" guy. I was referred to an oncologist and was able to get into a study that has me taking an anti-estrogen for the next 5 years and I don't have to pay for these very expensive pills.
On Dec.13 I had the other boob reduced and lifted so it matches the new boob better. Boob guy took a tissue sample and I only recently learned that there was a cancer there but boob guy got all that and it was non-invasive as well. The one that had the masectomy was supposed to be but in the 2 months before surgery it had become invasive. Again, all was removed so I should be looking a longer life!! Thanks to God and all my friends and family that prayed for me.
On November 20 birthmom had her parental rights terminated. She didn't show for court and called the case worker demanding to see J. and was refused!! She claims she didn't know when court was and after swearing and yelling ended the conversation with "I'm gonna find him". Fat chance of that since she doesn't work, drive or have a clue where we live so too bad. It's a shame that she puts herself before the welfare of her children and I'm sure her heart will be heavy for a long time but maybe it's part of God's plan.
And with the new year, J. has finally started his special ed preschool. I had to become an educational surrogate because we couldn't locate birthmom to sign the paperwork this time.
But the best news is that we have FINALLY started the adoption process. If we get all this paperwork of our own filled out and we also need to get fingerprinted, then JAYDEN MAGNUS STEVENSON will officially join our family by the beginning of April.
I trust you've all had a great 2007 and look forward to an even better 2008. As for me, all is well. (It's part of God's plan!)
So says Amma.
So she got us the referral and we finally got the birthmom to sign all the needed paperwork.
In late April, I lost my beloved Aunt Helen. She's my mom's younger sister and they shared the same birthday. Mom is 5 years older. I really enjoyed e-mailing with her as she was a rather avid computer user. Some years ago she managed to put together quite a family history using the net and it was pretty interesting. Needless to say, it was a sad day for all of us who travelled from as far as the northwest to attend services. It was also great to see all my cousins that I haven't seen (some) in years. Most of us got together for lunch before some of us had to dash off to the airport. I also had the good fortune to visit with an old friend of my aunt's that I hadn't seen since the last of the big weddings of one of Auntie's girls. My aunt and her friend were born a day apart and met in high school and became lifelong chums. When this lady told her mother my aunt's last name, her mom recalled being in the hospital with my grandmother. They didn't know it till high school that they'd actually met at birth! I try to send this lovely lady a note now and then but haven't heard anything back. I'm thinking of calling her to see how she is. I know she never married or had kids and she seemed like she might have a little dementia. She lives in an assisted living apartment. She was still working, part time, taking the train into New York. Her last day of work, she never did get to the office, only as far as Newark and after some couple of hours of delay, went home. That was on 9/11.
In May, I felt a little pain and ignored it. A week or so later, it came back and I got in to see the doctor right away. I scheduled a mammogram and bone density scan since it had been a couple years since the last ones and on June 6 got those done. I flunked both. I have osteoporosis and now take Boniva and try to watch the salt and caffeine. The left breast showed a couple areas of calcifications and I was soon referred to a surgeon. I had a stereo tactic biopsy done (by a doctor who was born at the same hospital I was and also grew up in NJ so that was cool because we talked a lot about "home"). That was June 18 and the results showed I had cancer but it was non-invasive. After discussing the results with the surgeon, I said I'd rather have the whole thing removed because as he described, he might not be able to get it all with lumpectomies of 2 areas and I can get immediate reconstruction. So off to the plastic surgeon to discuss all that and get triple checked before the "Big Day". I also had to quit the butts.
Next up on the menu was our son's testing at Dartmouth Hitchcock in Lebanon, NH. This was supposed to take place Sept. 5 but they had a cancellation so we could look forward to Aug. 16 instead.
In between all this brou ha ha, the state took J.'s birthmom to court in June to terminate the parental rights or do a mediated adoption. The alleged father couldn't be found so his rights to J. were terminated that day. Birthmom wanted the mediated adoption. We got all our meeting and court dates together and she never showed. She also has another child she was going to do the same thing and never showed for that meeting. Seems birthmom broke up with her boyfriend in RI and moved back to NH. And has a miscarriage. She requested to see J. on Aug. 17 and so we went. She still wanted to mediate and was going to call her lawyer. She also got the test results from Dartmouth. Yes, J. was indeed diagnosed with Austism Spectrum Disorder (mid-range) and she said she wanted to go to all his doctor appointments. I had to explain that he'd be getting therapy at home (mine) and that this is not a disease but a neurological disorder. He cried when he saw her and I decided that this was the last time I would subject him to this trauma. But we needed more paperwork signed so we had to put up with it.
On Aug.21 I had my surgery. All went well and from the pathology report, the surgeon got it all. Good news was no chemo or radiation. Now I pretty much belong to the plastic surgeon or "boob" guy. I was referred to an oncologist and was able to get into a study that has me taking an anti-estrogen for the next 5 years and I don't have to pay for these very expensive pills.
On Dec.13 I had the other boob reduced and lifted so it matches the new boob better. Boob guy took a tissue sample and I only recently learned that there was a cancer there but boob guy got all that and it was non-invasive as well. The one that had the masectomy was supposed to be but in the 2 months before surgery it had become invasive. Again, all was removed so I should be looking a longer life!! Thanks to God and all my friends and family that prayed for me.
On November 20 birthmom had her parental rights terminated. She didn't show for court and called the case worker demanding to see J. and was refused!! She claims she didn't know when court was and after swearing and yelling ended the conversation with "I'm gonna find him". Fat chance of that since she doesn't work, drive or have a clue where we live so too bad. It's a shame that she puts herself before the welfare of her children and I'm sure her heart will be heavy for a long time but maybe it's part of God's plan.
And with the new year, J. has finally started his special ed preschool. I had to become an educational surrogate because we couldn't locate birthmom to sign the paperwork this time.
But the best news is that we have FINALLY started the adoption process. If we get all this paperwork of our own filled out and we also need to get fingerprinted, then JAYDEN MAGNUS STEVENSON will officially join our family by the beginning of April.
I trust you've all had a great 2007 and look forward to an even better 2008. As for me, all is well. (It's part of God's plan!)
So says Amma.
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